Friday, May 22, 2009

Pool party and a haircut (and way too many thoughts)

Ollie got to have a bunch of his buddies over for a little pool party in our backyard. It was a lot of fun and the water balloons were maybe the strongest I've ever seen, we could not pop those things. Life is just better with a tan and a bathing suit. Then Ollie's hair got cut today and after the dramatic, near death experience (in Oliver's opinion) he actually survived and smiled proudly with his new do. I was so tempted to let it grow out cause last time it was long was when he was 1 and I'm just curious to see what it would look like. But as usual, convenience always wins. It is just so much easier, plus he has a lot of hair and it is stick straight, so the growing out phase could be a bad one. And it's summer man! Oliver is increasingly hilarious by the way.

Sometimes I feel like I should carry around a little Ollie notebook so I can document the everyday occurences that are just hilarious. Maybe the most funny thing right now is his facial expressions. Oh if I could just document each and every one of those. I walked while Ryan longboarded with Ollie in arms to the gas station, and the look on his face was just priceless. He is SURE that his dad IS the coolest guy around. Totally true. Everytime they'd skate past me, Ollie would high five me, and made sure to always do it, like he didn't want me being left out of the fun. He is so unbelievably loving. If I could ask one thing of my kids, it would be that.

Lately everytime we go to the park, there is always that one kid who is a total punk, just pushing and picking on everyone. Ollie cannot fathom how anyone wouldn't want to hang out with him, he just wants to be friends with everyone. So he goes up to this kid and this kid calls him a "baby" and pushes him. I thought Ollie was going to cry but then he offered this kid the chip he had in his hand, to which the kid still pushed away and left. Another time Ollie saw these two boys at the top of the highest slide so he just had to follow them to go down. On his way up the stairs to play, he was totally laughing and trying to join in their fun. The kid closest to Oliver, saw him and told he he couldn't go up there and started trying to push him down the stairs. I usually like to see how things pan out, but considering how steep the stairs wer, Ollie was about to get pushed off a two-story platform. So I yelled, probably a little too loudly, "Do not touch him again!". I was totally in mom defense. Didn't help that I had just watched an Oprah on bullies. So once Ollie saw that I was worried and mad, he started crying and realized there was no reason for this little boy to be so mean to him. Oh it just makes me want to spank some kids, and I don't even believe in spanking!

I have to admit that it's pretty often that I will totally call out a kid at the park who is being rude and picking on other kids. And I know kids will be kids and sometimes they just have their moments, but they still should recognize that it's approproiate to be upset but not ok to take it out on others. I know, mom police, here I go. Ryan loves it, he's like at least your taking care of business baby. If I see a mom close by though I'm definetely more cautious cause I would hate to step on toes. I had a funny experience the other day though. Ollie brought a couple toys to the park and so I knew he would just have to share the whole time, cause it's just an unwritten rule that if toys are brought to the park, you cannot expect kids not to be interested. So anyways he was sharing his toys really nicely and all the kids were playing really well. After a while though, you could tell the tension was building with all the kids because they were sick of having to take turns with so many others. Ollie got interested in picking up wood chips off the ground and make-believing them into airplanes and trains, etc. So a little girl who was getting especially frusterated kept following Ollie around and everytime he'd pick something up, she'd take it out of his hand. Everytime I said to her, "If you want something from him, you need to ask him. You never take something from someone without asking". She just looked at me like, are you serious you're telling me what to do. Then I helped her learn how to do what Ollie was doing and find her own wood chips. It's funny cause it's not like she was this mean kid, she just wanted to play but didn't know how without taking something from someone. Some kids are just like that. They have a hard time creating their own fun cause when they see someone else's fun, they want THAT and they don't understand a way to get it on their own. Later her mom came up to me and I actually got a little nervous that she would be annoyed with me. But she basically said that she really appreciated the direction I gave her little girl and since she had 3 other kids there, it was nice to have someone watching her. As much as I would hope that Oliver will never be the aggressor in a fight, I'm sure he will and if I'm not there to direct him, I'd hope someone else would, especially if he is picking on their child. Wow my posts get so long. I should just start a whole new blog for online journaling cause I'm sure not everyone wants to hear my every opinion. Unless you're still reading this, then I guess you do, or you're just bored:)

By the way, is anybody else scared of being the crazy mom when kids pick on your kid? Like seriously, I have thought, if I find out some kid from school is taunting one of mine, I will march right over to the school and make them very sorry. Is that bad? I have to remind myself that all kids have a reason for acting the way they do, and that is the problem to deal with. But I did find out from Oprah that telling your kids to ignore bullying is probably the worst thing you can do. It's like telling them it doesn't matter or it's not important, when it really really is to them. I mean 3 of the kids featured on the show actually comitted suicide because they felt like there was no way out. Can you imagine? I have always thought that teaching my kids confidence is one of the most important things, cause bullies pick out those kids that just deal with what's coming. I hope my kids will put others in their place and protect those who are being picked on. I loved this little boy on the show who was taught how to use his voice to tell a bully NO! It was so funny cause this therapist was like, I want you to use the harshest voice you ever have with your dog with me right now. The moment this strong voice came out of his little body, you could tell he just finally believed in himself enough to stand up. Made me well up a little. You gotta love Oprah. Ok I promise this is the end, if anyone is still reading.

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

America doesn't know how to sing

Ok so really I am totally shocked. How did Adam Lambert NOT win American Idol, are you serious? Sure, Chris is a nice guy and has a good voice but Adam has a phenomenal voice. Basically it's clear that Adam was a little over some people's heads, he is a little eccentric. But seriously it should be about who has the best voice, I am sad for Adam. I haven't been hardcore for anyone but I just assumed Adam would take it cause it was so obvious that his voice was superior. Even in their last Queen song, you almost felt bad for Chris next to Adam because he is such a power house and has such range. And girls, he is MARRIED so let's not just vote for someone based on how well they can fit into a boy band, calm yourselves. Ok that's all for now. Just had to voice the injustice of it all.


I'm sure you didn't know that Akon's real name is Aliaune Damala Bouga Time Puru Nacka Lu Lu Lu Badara Akon Thiam. These are things you only find out when you're searching baby name sites. You can thank me later...

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Financial Reckoning

Are we sure we want to be apart of a 15.4 BILLION dollar deficit in California. That makes my stomach hurt. I actually can't even comprehend that amount. How does that even happen? And I'm not just asking that rhetorically. I actually need to know. are fired.

Monday, May 18, 2009

A night of firsts

I had to write about two firsts that happened tonight. We got home from a ward fhe and of course Ollie had to go to his pool and play right when he got out of the car. What we didn't notice was a group of bees drinking from the water and sure enough a minute later Ollie was screaming in pain, saying "ouch, ouch". He stepped on one and Ryan got the stinger out and ran his foot under cold water. Then we proceeded to talk about those naughty bees and that when we see them we need to steer clear. We kept an eye on him to make sure he wasn't allergic. I'm a little relieved to get that first bee sting out of the way.

Another first is that Ollie is sleeping as we speak NOT in a crib! He's has already done this a few times but always with me in the room on vacation. It's never been an all night by yourself ordeal so I'll report on how that all goes. But we put him on his bed about 40 minutes ago and he still has not come out or cried. What a sweet boy. It felt funny dismantling his crib knowing that next time we put it up, we'd be placing our little girl there. I already had my mom buy a toddler bed off craigslist at home for Ollie, so this will be some nice practice. Plus then he won't have to sleep on a twin mattress on the floor for very long. Growing up all over the place.

*An update from last nights adventure. Well it could not have gone better. He went to bed easily and did not wake up at all last night, and then woke up at almost 7:30 this morning! We should have just started him in a bed from the beginning:)

Sunday, May 17, 2009

21 weeks

Ahhhhh, at this point of pregnancy I am so grateful first off to feel A LOT better. I think looking back it was worst than I thought at the time. It's probably not a good sign to NOT want to get out of bed in the morning or really function at all throughout the day. That is very unlike me. So I am sure glad that is over and I'm feeling more like myself. I wonder if it's true that boy and girl pregnancies are way different, this one sure has been. I am also immensely grateful that it is warm and sunny outside. With a two year old, this is like a must. I do not know how people survive winters here with little kids, well without totally losing it. Speaking of the warmth, I am slowly packing and getting really excited for our move. We also get to go see Austin come home at the end of the month. Crazy that it's already been 2 years, wow. When he left Ollie was a newborn and now he returns to a full blown toddler with attitude to match. Oliver will love another "big boy" to adore.

I have already had a few people ask me when am I due and then when I respond end of September, they are like, wow you still have a ways to go. Come on people, I don't look THAT big yet, give the pregnant girl a break! But it's actually fun, to look pregnant instead of just really chubby, so it's ok. I'm always happy when my belly gets past my chest, a real milestone.

For the first time this week I have been totally sure that I can feel this baby girl, and now it is more and more frequent. It is so fun to feel those first kicks. It's like this little piece of reality for me because just knowing I'm pregnant doesn't really make it real, for some reason. I like having that connection with her. Knowing that when I'm singing in the car with Ollie, she can hear us. And when I laugh all day at Oliver, she's wondering what is so funny and is enjoying the belly ride.

Friday, May 15, 2009

What Oliver's been up to...

Hanging out with his cousin Noelle while we help moved the Winstead's into their new place in Sugar House. We discovered all sorts of fun things at the park there. And I discovered that watching two kids at the park is way different than watching one. Plus there were about a million people there and I am deathly scared of kidnappers.

While packing the other day, Oliver ran over to me so excited about something and finally I realized he was yelling "toes!" He had taken a red sharpee and painted his toenails. I guess he missed having them painted. I kept saying "Oh pretty", so he started calling them pretty too.
Of course hanging out with mom is the best, we are such buddies. He has had some major Dad moments this week too. He's usually used to Ryan leaving in the morning for school and demands a hug and kiss for us both. If Ryan forgets a hug for me, he pushes him to me and says"hug". It is too funny. Usually we do a hug sandwich, it's just easier that way. But sometimes we run up to campus to drop off lunch or whatever Ryan needs, so Ollie only sees him for a minute. On the ride home he is devastated and cries and then when we get out of the car he runs out to the end of the driveway and yells "dada". He LOVES that Dad of his, and who can blame him. One of my favorite things is to see the look on Ollie's face when Ryan gets home. Pure joy and excitement. Eating yummy things, like our mother's day cake. This was fun until he kept saying "cah-kay" (Oliver's take on the word cake) demanding it at all times. So it got thrown away.
Who doesn't love to play the piano naked once in a while?
We have all this snowboard stuff and Ollie usually puts on googles, one glove, and a helmet. I wish I could photo the whole get-up, it's pretty funny.

Monday, May 11, 2009

Thoughts on Mother's Day

So I was watching "A Baby Story" (I know surprise, surprise) the other day and there was this mom on it who was just driving me insane! She said it was her worst nightmare essentially to be just a stay-at-home mom. She actually had her husband quit his job and move home to start a business together from home so he would have an equal part of the raising of their kids. She said that if he worked outside the home basically her kids wouldn't know their dad and she didn't always want to be the one who they depended on. It made me so sad to realize that this is what it's come down to.

My mom was always home with us. Some days I would call from the nurse and I'm sure my mom knew it wasn't a dire situation but she let me come home because it was a chance to hang out at home alone with mom, something that didn't happen that often. I love that my mom did this, realizing that time with her sometimes was more important than school. It's so interesting to realize how much things have changed. Growing up I actually had fantasies of being a single mom, super cool, just handling life on my own with my gorgeous kids in New York. Or that scene with the working mom who handles everything and somehow accomplishes it all without failing anyone or anything. That is just NOT POSSIBLE. I've had this conversation with my sister Leah a lot, just about how women now are made to think they really can do it all and not just do it, but do it 100%. Sure it's simple to work full time and give 100% to that, and then be a mom 100%, and then be a wife 100%. But guess what? That equals to 300%. Pretty sure that's impossible. Something will always lack and I think we will look back and say, you know what, I didn't do great at anything, just good enough.

And hey, I have not always thought this. I have struggled with the idea of never working again, never being apart of something huge outside the home. I remembered when I was considering a few different jobs, I was talking to my mom and she finally just said, "it's so sad that you are made to think that being a mom isn't good enough". It was a huge moment for me to realize I really thought that. Not that I BELIEVED it, I just have grown up hearing it so much that it becomes part of your thinking. I even remember thinking before having kids, what do moms do all the time? I asked a few friends who had kids, "do you ever get bored"? They said, "just wait, you'll see". I'm sure I just sounded a little rude and naive. But it's so true. Life is so fulfilling and so rewarding. Who knew I could feel like I accomplished so much in one day with really nothing to show for it, other than a healthy happy kid. Now when people ask me that, I'm sort of like, been'll see. Because you realize that although the things you may have done before were rewarding in some way, it is no where near what you feel when you are raising kids...and doing it right.

I think my mom told me this most important piece of information. That if you have a happy marriage and a happy family, what else can really matter. I could be the most successful doctor in the world but if I came home to kids who were cared for all day by strangers, a husband who I hardly knew anymore, and the guilt that comes with that, what do you have left? At the end of your life, what will you be grateful for? A job. I don't think so. It's funny cause even while I've been sitting here typing this Oliver has come over to me a few times just to sit with me and hug me and kiss me like he misses me. Imagine missing that all day, it's too much. And the thing is, so many people were just raised like this so they don't know any different. But what if they knew what they were giving up, would they still do it? When Ryan and I first got married I worked at a preschool with the cutest group of 2 and 3 year olds. Some of them would get dropped off before 7 in the morning and their parents would come pick them up around 6 or 7 that night. These are 2 and 3 year old kids. I'm sure they stopped at a drive-thru on the way home and had maybe an hour before bed. 1 hour they get to spend with their parents. I actually cried at work a few times realizing that I was spending more time with these kids than their parents were.

Sometimes I know that situation's do not allow for a mom to be home with her kids. It breaks my heart for that mom who wants so badly to be home but can't. I hope I'm never in that situation. I don't want to offend anyone who's mother worked, or anyone who is currently working. This is just my opinion and I'm sticking to it. I guess it's the blessing of having a blog to rant and rave on:) All I know is that this Mother's Day there is no other job I'd rather be doing and there is nothing more rewarding, I know that for a fact. I hope we mom's can love our kids so that they will someday show it. Mom's are the coolest, don't let anyone ever tell you different.

Friday, May 8, 2009

Drumroll please...

I know! Who knew Facer's (well at least Nita and Burnetts genes) could produce girls, we are very pleased with ourselves! So yeah, very exciting news and now the name game begins as well as thinking of buying tons of cute girl clothes cause let's be honest, it's about 100 times more fun to buy girl clothes than boys. It was funny cause this morning before we went in, we were like, last chance guess...what do you think? Ryan said girl and I was like yeah, totally girl. It was fun to be right about that although either way it would have been awesome. Hopefully there is not a penis hiding somewhere in there or else we'll get a big surprise. Oliver will be so excited to have a little girl to love, he is totally a sister's brother, just like mine:) Picking names is SO HARD for me so wish me luck to find that perfect name for a girl with Oliver's face:) Wouldn't it just be so darling to see a little blonde curly haired Ryan look alike. I cannot wait. Everything else also looked good, blessings blessings. I want to snuggle her now. Well maybe not now, scary.

Monday, May 4, 2009

A little documentation...

So I'm gonna have to be that mom who blogs about her child's bodily fluids. Oliver peed and pooped in the toilet today! But don't be fooled, he is not potty trained, we are just dabbling in it here and there making sure he's ready. Usually he couldn't care less about what is in his diaper but recently I have been mentioning the potty to him and sitting myself on the toilet when he does, a little moral support never hurt anyone. So I am hoping this makes him more aware of that part of life, and so far it seems to be working. I was going to try the potty boot camp, but I think that might stress him out a little...we'll probably try that a little later. As of now we're just celebrating this small achievement.

Also, since Ryan and I have gone out golfing a few times, Oliver has become pretty passionate about the sport (I use that word very lightly with golf). So today I bought him a plastic set for 3 bucks at Big Lots. The minute I unwrapped it, he threw the pack over his arm and said "bye" in the funniest way, with such attitude. He then went out to the grass in the backyard to set up his own personal game.

One of my favorite things lately with Ollie is bedtime prayers. When we say them, he makes Ryan and I stand right next to each other so we are close enough for him to put both his arms around our necks and he tried repeating our prayer in his sweet little voice, it usually sounds something like this.
Me: "We're thankful for dadda"
Ollie: "Dadda"
Me: "We're grateful for all our blessings"
Ollie: "Blessings"
Me: "Help us to be kind and loving"
Ollie: "Kind and loving"

So you get the idea. And whenever he hears an amen, he is like "amen!". Such enthusiasm. And we always say "love you" when we say goodnight, and he says it over and over as we leave the room, in his little sing song voice. It really is the best.

A favorite game lately is "I get you". Ryan will always say, "I'm gonna get you" and then chase Oliver around the house. Now Ollie is the one saying "I get you" and then Ryan hides while Ollie runs around the house yelling dadda until he hears Ryan squeaking hints from his hiding spots. It pretty hilarious to watch cause usually Ryan startles him and he squeals for joy.

He is starting to talk a lot more and a lot clearer. Sometimes I still think he's combining English and Spanish and I just have to have him show me what he wants. But it's getting there. Lately he will only need to hear a word once and then days later will still remember it, so that's big improvement. The delay is normal for bilingual kids and I know it will pay off when he's acing Spanish in High School:) The other day at church he went up to one of the members in choir and said "chocala" which is high five in Spanish. It was so funny. I feel like I'm laughing all day with him because he really does the funniest things. I can't wait to see what kind of crazy kid he will grow into. He is such a wild man and such a total boy but also the sweetest, most sensitive little guy. That's a good combo. We were watching Lars and the Real Girl, one of my top faves and also all of Ollie's favorite songs, and he seriously sat through the whole movie, well almost. The best part was that whenever anyone was sad or the music would change, Ollie would look at me and his eyebrows would furrow and he just said "sad". He is so intuitive and can key into emotions amazingly well, especially when music is involved. Maybe he'll write beautiful music one day like his favorites from Lars. He is so amazing.

Happy Birthday Annie!

My wonderful little sister Annie has a birthday today so I just had to do a shout out. Anyone who knows Annie, knows she is seriously the best. She is always up for anything and definetely has some major guts. She is a great example to me and I love her.